You know those big weddings we are reputed to have in Nigeria. Especially the big Yoruba weddings usually paid for by the parents. It starts with the introduction of the family members, then the big engagement ceremony accompanied by the overnight party. Next is the wedding day with the religious element, Nikkei or church wedding followed by a reception held in a school hall or event centre. The wedding day ends with the bride going to her husbands family home. The grooms family is not left out as the grooms’ side is waiting to hold their own Thanksgiving and reception party. This is usually held on a Sunday and can be preceded by a church thanksgiving service at the grooms’ parents/family church followed by another party.
The couple has been celebrated, hopefully had fun through this very busy time. A lot of money has been spent over the various events over this period. The parents and family have had their chance at stardom to show how well they can celebrate and have thrown their child a befitting wedding.
After the wedding everyone especially the family and the couple goes away to rest and recover. The couple goes on a honeymoon but most of the time this time is spent recovering from the sheer exhaustion of the wedding festivities.
At home parents are still chasing money for aso-ebi, there are several instances where people who collected aso-ebi for all events have just not paid. Vendors are still trying to collect their balance. The family is still smoothening the ruffled feathers of guests and in-laws who will most likely be complaining that they were not served enough champagne or not given enough time on the dance floor! I have to ask who really enjoyed these events?
After all this the couple has to settle down and start life as a married couple. The couple if they are lucky will get some gifts they can really use in their home after sorting through multiple crockery sets they have received. So isn’t it quite ludicrous when this same couple who have had millions spent on their wedding is struggling with buying furniture, or paying rent or are having to live with either parent because they don’t have enough funds to get a place of their own after getting married.
So whom really does the huge wedding worth millions benefit? The couple in most of these cases simply got a big wedding because this is what their parents wanted to do. If these same people asked their parents for the funds that would be spent on the big wedding be given to them instead to start their lives or to invest the parents are likely to say no. The parents say that they are the ones throwing the wedding and the couple should simply show up.
After all the spending, stress and activity couples who have had big weddings or have attended a couple of these big weddings will announce that they are not likely to throw a big wedding for their children. More and more announce that they would encourage their own children to go for a destination wedding to guarantee that a small intimate wedding can be planned and achieved.
So will big weddings, the type synonymous with Nigeria ever be phased out?
