Mum, Bobbie Thomas appears shares infertility struggles and balancing family vs career. She is known for sharing her favorite skin care treatments, the latest manicure trends and the top shades of the season. She tackled another sensitivie issue on Infertility.
Since Thomas opened up about going through IVF, she has spoken out about the stigma that surrounds infertility encouraging women — and their partners — to seek information earlier rather than later.
She wrote a blog for TODAY and let the morning show chronicle her journey. Like many women, Thomas says her career was always a priority. The former E! red carpet host and Fashion Police co-host only started making room for her personal life once she reached a stable place in her career. At 39, she married lawyer Michael Marion and her thoughts turned to family. She never thought she’d have trouble having a baby.
“We watch these celebrities well into their 40s conceive children and think, ‘Oh, anybody can do it — modern medicine, that’s totally cool,’” said Thomas, now 42. “[There’s] a misleading concept that modern medicine is just going to make it work overnight. And that’s not the case.” Thomas didn’t wait long to talk to a reproductive specialist. She’d been told there was no need to worry about discussing infertility until after a year of trying to conceive. However, she went against that advice when a friend in her 20s had difficulty becoming pregnant.
“Had I taken that advice and not seen a reproductive specialist, Miles would not be here,” Thomas said, referencing her 14-month-old son. Thomas recognizes her privilege in the situation, both of having access to some of the country’s best doctors and being able to pay the high cost of treatments.
The American Society for Reproductive Medicine classifies infertility as a disease that affects one in eight couples. According to Forbes, the cost of in vitro fertilization (IVF), one treatment for infertility, runs between $12,000 and $20,000 for each cycle.
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The Journey
“I was so lucky, incredibly lucky. I had less than an 8 percent chance of having Miles … but I will never forget the women who did not get that outcome,” she said. Reaching out to a reproductive specialist was the first step. Next came a seemingly endless cycle of doctors appointments and needles — and whispers. “People were asking questions and I whispered often, ‘I’m going through IVF,’” Thomas said. “I think it’s a sensitive issue because somebody often feels like a failure. I know I did in my situation.” Thomas learned she was not alone in that feeling when she announced her struggles on live TV.
“I think because we whisper too often, we don’t talk about this, and the worst part of it is that we don’t get accurate information.”
Thomas’ biggest piece of advice to those who want to start a family: Start talking immediately and seek advice from a medical professional — “not what my sister’s cousin’s friend’s neighbor said.”
“We have to get over being embarrassed to talk about it in the first place. So many people are affected by this and we just don’t talk about it. This should be a topic that’s comfortable,” she said.
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A Pew Research Study found that 40 percent of women think it’s better to wait to have children until one is well established in her career. Thomas says in today’s society, both professional and personal dreams can be a priority.
“I’m a great example of the fact that we plan for everything in life, mainly our careers … but I didn’t think about my personal life … That shouldn’t take a back seat to those other dreams that you have,” she said.
“I think you can have it all, but sometimes not at once, and you have to choose how to prioritize and how to find that balance.” Her “must have” accessory is a platform to help other families who want children. “The earlier you learn about your body, the more bang for your buck you’ll get through the whole ride that we call life,” she said.
Source: wtop.com
