Helping Children Navigate Bad and Scary News in a World That Feels Overwhelming

Children today are growing up in a world where bad news is not just a headline you hear once and move on from. It is everywhere, repeated, remixed, and repackaged by social media algorithms that thrive on shock and urgency. A single scary event can appear hundreds of times through reactions, edits, memes, commentary videos, and copycat content. Before you realise it, your child has consumed the same fear-triggering story in many different formats.

This constant exposure, combined with children’s natural curiosity, can fuel anxiety, especially when they sense that adults are afraid or when home does not feel transparent or reassuring. Banning the news completely might be tempting, but it is rarely realistic. News now finds our children through TV, devices, chats, and social media, whether we approve or not.

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The goal is not to shield them from every headline. The real work is to equip them with emotional tools, context, and resilience so that they can process what they see and still feel safe. Psychologists like Dr. Lisa Damour, author of The Emotional Lives of Teenagers, remind us that children do not struggle solely because of stress; they struggle when stress meets a lack of support and clarity. Dr Dan Siegel’s well-known idea of “name it to tame it” also shows that helping children put words to their fears can reduce those fears.

Organisations such as the American Psychological Association consistently encourage adults to talk openly with children about distressing events, help them label their feelings, and offer age-appropriate context rather than leaving them alone with constant, unfiltered media. Instead of trying to shut the world out, we can help our children build the emotional muscles to cope with it.

1. Create a Family Plan for When They See Scary News

Children cope better when they know exactly what to do in a difficult moment. A simple family plan gives them a script to follow, rather than leaving them alone with fear and confusion. Explain that they will sometimes see upsetting content, and that this does not mean they are in immediate danger. Still, it means they should follow the family’s steps.

Teach them to do the following whenever they see scary or confusing news online:

Pause and resist the urge to share, repost, or react immediately.
Take a slow, deep breath to help their body calm down.
Ask themselves, “Is this real or could it be exaggerated or edited?”
Come to a safe adult, such as you, a guardian or a trusted teacher.
Talk about what they saw before they decide what to think or do.

This kind of plan reflects guidance from the American Psychological Association, which recommends helping children pause, limit repeated exposure, name their emotions, and talk to a trusted adult when they encounter disturbing news.

2. Talk About Safety and Replace Fear With Facts

Once your child tells you what they have seen, their biggest unspoken question is often, “Could this happen to us”. If you do not address this directly, their imagination fills in the gaps. Talking about safety does not increase fear. Research and clinical experience show that preparedness usually reduces anxiety.

Explain calmly and clearly:

How your home helps to keep everyone safe.
The safety systems that are in place at school and in your community.
Who they should contact in an emergency.
Simple family meet-up points in case something serious happens.

You can also offer a short script they can hold onto, for example:
“Scary things do happen sometimes, but many people work every day to keep us safe. We also have a family plan for what to do, and we will face things together.”

This kind of framing helps move your child from vague fear to concrete understanding, which is exactly the sort of reassurance bodies like the APA suggest when speaking to children about difficult events.

3. Ground Them Emotionally or Spiritually

When the world feels shaky, children need something solid to stand on. Grounding helps them feel anchored again in the present moment, rather than mentally living in the scary story they saw online.

Reading Psalm 91 or similar passages can become a calming ritual that reminds your child of the protection and care they receive.

If you want to use other evidence-based grounding tools you could try

“Name it to tame it”, a phrase from Dr Dan Siegel. When children put their feelings into words, the emotional part of the brain settles.
The 5 4 3 2 1 technique, where they name five things they can see, four they can touch, three they can hear, two they can smell, and one they can taste.
Gratitude journaling, where they write down a few things that went well that day.

You might also use a simple family affirmation, such as: “We cannot control the whole world, but we can control our home, our choices, and how we care for each other.”

These small practices teach their nervous system that right now, in this moment, they are safe and supported.

4. Give Them Space to Release Their Feelings

Children need space to express and process what they have seen. When adults are dismissive, children do not stop feeling afraid, they simply stop talking about it. That silence can make their anxiety grow in the dark.

Invite conversation with open questions like:

“What exactly did you see”.
“How did it make you feel”.
“What part scared you the most”.

Psychologists such as Dr Lisa Damour emphasise that when adults listen and validate emotions, children regain stability more quickly. This echoes the APA’s guidance to acknowledge children’s feelings instead of minimising them.

Instead of saying, “Do not worry about it” or “It is nothing”, you can try:
“Thank you for telling me. I can see why that would feel scary. Let us talk about it together.”

When a child feels heard, they also feel less alone with their fear.

5. Teach the Circle of Control

A core idea in cognitive behavioural therapy is learning to separate what we can control from what we cannot. This is powerful for adults, and it is just as powerful for children.

Sit with your child and create two columns. Label one “Things I can control” and the other “Things I cannot control”. Fill them in together.

They can control:

What they watch and when they stop.
Who they follow online.
Whether they take breaks from screens.
How they care for their mind and body.
Whether they share good news.
Whether they talk to a safe adult when they are worried.

They cannot control:

World events.
Other people’s behaviour.
The fact that some people share scary content.
How often algorithms repeat certain stories (but they can control what they click on)

This exercise aligns with CBT principles widely used by clinicians. It shows your child that while they cannot fix everything, they are not completely powerless. That shift reduces helplessness and supports emotional resilience.

6. Set Healthy News and Social Media Boundaries

Children need boundaries around news and social media, just as they need boundaries around food, sleep and play. The timing and amount of exposure makes a real difference to their mood and sleep.

Work together to create simple, practical rules such as:

No news or heavy content first thing in the morning, so they do not start the day in a state of alarm.
No scary news or violent videos close to bedtime, because this can affect sleep and nightmares.
No doomscrolling during homework or study time.
Talking about upsetting content during the day, when everyone is more regulated and less tired.

You might also agree to limit how many times a day they check news updates. A “safe media routine” with clear limits reflects the kind of structured media use that child development experts and bodies like the APA recommend.

7. Actively Feed Their Minds With Good

If children only see the worst of the world, they begin to believe that this is all there is. Adults need to be intentional about showing them that goodness, creativity and kindness still exist.

You can:

Share positive or hopeful stories at dinner.
Follow accounts that highlight kindness, innovation or problem solving.
Celebrate small wins at home, such as a kind gesture or a brave moment.
Watch uplifting or inspiring content together and talk about it.

This does not mean pretending that bad things do not happen. It means balancing the picture, so their brain also records safety, joy and hope. In many ways, balance itself becomes a form of protection.

8. Keep the Home Emotionally Safe

Children are always observing. They pick up on your tone, your facial expressions and your side conversations, even when you think they are not listening. The emotional climate of the home can either increase their anxiety or help it melt away.

Aim for a home that feels calm, connected and predictable. This does not mean you never feel worried as an adult. It simply means you are mindful about how much of your raw anxiety you place on your child’s shoulders. You can be honest in age-appropriate ways while still offering reassurance.

When the outside world feels noisy and frightening, home should be the place that reminds your child, “You are safe. You are seen. You are not facing this alone.”

In the end, children do not need a perfect world to feel secure. They need caring adults who help them understand what they see, process how they feel and remember that they are deeply loved and protected, even when the headlines are heavy.