Meet Modupe Ehirim, our Mum of the Month, whose passion for nurturing marriages and family life has made her one of Nigeria’s leading voices in marriage education. As a seasoned marriage coach in Nigeria, Modupe has impacted countless families, guiding couples through the joys and challenges of building strong, resilient relationships.
Who is Modupe Ehirim? Tell us a bit about yourself!
I am Modupe Ehirim, a marriage educator and coach, and the founder of The Right Fit Marriage Academy. Through my work, I guide couples on creating and sustaining healthy marriages that enrich their lives and impact their communities.
You wear so many hats, can you share a bit about all of them?
I wear many hats—wife, mum, grandma, founder of The Right Fit Marriage Academy, and a dedicated marriage coach in Nigeria. I’m also involved in board roles, including OASIS International and Africa Speaks 2018 Trust, and as a Trustee of the Network of Family Life Practitioners. In all these roles, my purpose is to foster strong family relationships and empower individuals to contribute positively to society.
What’s something surprising about you that most people don’t know?
I’m the very first person in my family to go to university on both my mother’s and father’s sides. It’s a milestone that has opened up many opportunities for me and is one of the reasons I am so passionate about education and community growth.
Can you tell us about your beautiful family?
My husband and I have been married for thirty-nine years. We have four wonderful children—two sons and two daughters—who are all grown and building lives of their own. Though I have no biological grandchildren yet, I’ve been blessed with an extended family of “adopted” children and grandchildren who bring so much joy into our lives.
How did you meet your husband, and what’s your love story?
We met during our NYSC in the same organization, becoming friends in a group of about twelve. Just three months in, I knew he was the one I’d like to marry if he asked. We dated for five years before marrying, and we’ve now shared thirty-nine years together.
Are you and your husband on the same page when it comes to parenting?
Not entirely! We come from different backgrounds, which naturally influenced our parenting approaches. However, we shared core values and a vision for the kind of adults we wanted our children to become. These shared values helped us to navigate differences and parent collaboratively.
What’s one of the funniest memories you have of your kids?
When they were all under ten, my children put on a play to entertain me, where they hilariously mimicked my mothering style. While it was all in good fun, it reminded me of the impact my actions have on them, even when I’m not aware.
What do you love most about your work and the many expressions of your purpose and passion?
I love that my role as a marriage coach in Nigeria allows me to grow intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally while positively impacting others. Helping people build fulfilling relationships is incredibly rewarding, especially knowing that healthy marriages benefit entire communities.
What’s the most fulfilling part of being a marriage coach?
My favorite part of being a marriage coach in Nigeria is seeing how couples can affect those around them. A decision to marry may seem private, but it has broad effects on everyone—from family and friends to co-workers and even society at large. I feel privileged to be part of that ripple effect.
How crucial is a support system for mums? Who’s in your tribe, and what does support look like for you?
Having a support system is essential, especially for mums juggling work and family. During my early years as a marriage coach in Nigeria, my close friends, family, and neighbors were my support. They helped with childcare and provided a sense of community, allowing me to pursue my career with peace of mind.
In what ways has parenting changed from when you were young to now?
When I was young, extended families lived close by, creating tight-knit communities with shared values. Today, with increased emigration and the advent of the internet, communities are more spread out and diverse. Parents need to be more intentional in creating supportive networks and building family values in a digital age.
How did you prepare your children to navigate today’s ever-changing world?
I raised my children on a foundation of strong values, teaching them to think independently and question the world around them. For example, I encouraged my son’s curiosity about different faith practices, which opened up honest conversations about our own beliefs and helped him respect other perspectives.
How do you balance work and parenting? Do you believe in the idea of ‘balance’?
My children are now over 30, so I see balance as meeting the needs of each life season. During my childbearing years, my husband and I agreed on sacrifices, with him as the main income earner while I worked a flexible 9-to-5. It was about finding harmony in each phase rather than striving for perfection.
What three essential tips would you give to parents raising children intentionally?
- Be clear on your reasons for having children and prepare to give more than you ever expected.
- Envision the values, character, and life skills you want your children to develop.
- Embrace change, as the world is evolving quickly, and stay open to learning and adapting alongside your children.
What inspired you to support families and become a marriage coach?
My journey as a marriage coach in Nigeria began with a desire to strengthen families. Working with couples taught me that healthy relationships are foundational to community well-being, and I wanted to help others build marriages that uplift not only their families but society as a whole.
What has motherhood taught you about yourself?
Motherhood has shown me that I am only human, with limitations. I’ve learned that I can’t do everything and need to prioritize what truly matters.
If you could choose one word to describe what every home needs, what would it be?
Empathy.
What’s one self-care practice you swear by?
My go-to self-care routine is journaling, which allows me to process my thoughts and experiences. I also love to read widely, which has broadened my perspective and helped me find solutions to various life challenges.
How do you keep things simple when it comes to beauty and style?
I don’t have an elaborate beauty routine; I’ve never worn makeup. My signature feature is my wide smile, which people often remember about me.
What do you love about LagosMums?
LagosMums provides a safe, supportive community for young mums to connect and share their motherhood journeys. It’s wonderful to be part of such a positive space.
Quick-Fire Trivia Fun with Modupe!
- N1 Million or more sleep?: Sleep, please!
- Shopping spree or all-expense-paid trip?: All-expense-paid trip to my dream destination.
- Homeschooling or traditional school?: Traditional school—children benefit from social interactions.
- Spa day or eat out?: Both sound good!
Thank you for reading this far and for getting to know Modupe with us! LagosMums is all about celebrating mums, sharing laughs, and supporting each other through the ups and downs of parenting. Want more stories like this and tips for family life?
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