Who is a good parent? What determines if you are? Mrs Idigbe addressed us at the LagosMums Parenting and Networking Event and discussed with the attendees about being a good parent and what determines if you are. There are some value systems to keep in mind as we raise our children to be global citizens. When good values are instilled then the child can stand firm wherever they might find themselves. Read below for more excerpts.
Who is a parent?
Anyone can be a father or mother but not necessarily good parents. A lack of good parenting is key to all the challenges the society currently faces. The chance to be a good parent is a one-time opportunity. It’s imperative for parents to constantly appraise themselves vis-à-vis the expected roles of a good parent.
Roles of Good Parents
- Establish and instill value systems in your children
- Know your child(ren) – (KYC).
- Learn the different parenting styles applicable to different ages and different characters.
- Develop and make listening skills a part of you.
- Be a parent and a friend, not a friend over being a parent.
Universally accepted Value Systems
- Love without strings attached and not for the view of direct benefit.
- Be truthful and hold integrity in high esteem.
- Humor – the ability to laugh at oneself, shortcomings or weakness helps in being able to take criticism well.
- Hardwork and perseverance are essential.
- Discipline and being punctual, respecting time.
- Delayed gratification
- Taking responsibility for your actions
- Ability to be tolerant
- Contentment with what you have
- Commitment to family values
- Humility and respect
Other Key Points on Good Parenting
- Care Giving is not the single most important role of a parent because ultimately this can be outsourced. Good parents are first teachers, counselors and advisers to their children. Parents are the examples that children see and learn from, parents are the mirrors and spiritual directors of their children. As a Parent your words and actions must be in sync! It is do as I do, not do as I say.
- Good Parents are protectors but not to the extent of shielding their children from having hands-on experiences. If children not allowed to have experiences they will lack the character to face future challenges.
- Children should be taught the principle that they can’t always have everything they ask for, learning delayed gratification enables children to learn to be content and limit frustrations if they do not get what they want.
- Many Nigerians are literate but not educated. To be educated is to be exposed to and imbibe universally accepted value systems and etiquette.
- Every Child has a different personality, therefore knowing each child and treating each child as a unique individual will enable you to get the best out of them.
- Focus on correcting the child and ensure that the child understands the correction or reasons for being punished. So they can learn from it and not repeat the same action in the future.
photo source: jnjparents