Our LagosMums of the Month series explores frank questions with LagosMums on motherhood, their philosophies on life among other things. We always learn when we read someone else’s story and they share their experiences with us. Meet Damilola Ajidagba our LagosMums of the month, she is also a wife and mother of a set of twins.
What was your experience as a first time mum?
My experience was a bit weird, although I knew I was expecting a set of twins as early as the 6th week after conception, I moved from disbelief to anxiety to expectation. My pregnancy was uneventful (went smoothly) up until the 35week, the remaining one week (they came at exactly 36 weeks) was very eventful.
Delivery itself (vaginal delivery) was very fast, despite the eventful final week. The whole process from water breaking to the first and final contraction and finally delivery took less than four hours. Then the leading twin was cephalic but the second twin was breech, after the leading twin came out, they had to manoeuvre the second twin (manually turn him to the right position) before he came out, it was an equally eventful delivery.
What do you love most about being a mum? What has the journey been so far?
Having tiny hands hold my leg while walking by and wrap their arms around my neck when I carry them.
The journey has been moving from awe struck – to being stressful – to beautiful – to very stressful – to being fun and every other adjective you can add.
[Tweet “Motherhood has been everything from awe struck, to stressful, beautiful and fun”]
What scares you most about /challenges you face being a mum?
Not doing enough for my children, not getting things right with them, what if I am wrong, what if’s? Challenges include having to sift through advice from experienced mums, the fact that you are experienced does not mean you did it right!
Could you share any funny moments as a mum?
In a bid to correct my son for biting my nipple while breastfeeding, I changed my face to make him realize what he did was bad, and he just smiled (like mum I know what I did) I just burst into laughter.
What lessons has marriage taught you?
Marriage has taught me to live your life, while your spouse does lives theirs. Please do live your life, do not remain stagnant because you are married. Help yourself to achieve your individual dreams. In as much as the family comes first, your dream comes next.
What do you think every home needs?
LOVE and UNDERSTANDING
[Tweet “Every home needs love and understanding “]
Have you made career choice based on your role as a mum?
Right now I am a stay at home mum, because I am taking care of my kids. I decided to opt out of work, for a while, and go for another degree so as to have a bit more time with my kids and at the same time upgrade myself academically…its a win-win situation.
Does the word “balance” exist?
I am sure it does, but most days I am at my wits end and cannot wait till my children are fast asleep so as to get to bed myself.
How do you relax?
I rarely have time to relax, but if i actually do, I think it is the little time I am on my tab surfing the internet, or eating…no scratch that, I eat while on my feet at times..I think I relax within the few hours I get to sleep at night, such is the life of Damilola ‘Iya Ibeji’ these days.
What is your parenting style?
Depending on the situation, I go from soft to hot even on my 8months old. Spare the rod and spoil the child, yes they are still very young, of course I will not hit them with a rod. There are many ways to make your point – change your face, increase the pitch of your voice, tell them they did well when they actually did well, tell them they are naughty and change the countenance of your face to prove your point. These are all ways to correct them now, as they grow older, devise different methods.
What is your guiding philosophy in life?
As much as possible, make peace with all men, the world is too small a place to keep grudges, live and let live.
What’s the most important skill that a Lagos mum needs?
Hmmm….ability to balance all I think!
Follow Damilola on @Iamquerida
To read posts on other Mums of the Month visit here..If you would like to be featured as a LagosMums Mum of the Month please contact us at [email protected]
