As we continue with our A to Z of parenting tips, we will be taking a look at how to teach your children patience.Last week we took a look at how to teach our children Originality. Patience is a virtue your child needs now from learning to wait for her turn on the swing, to waiting their turn to play a computer game. Patience teaches the value of delaying gratification, the ability to think calmly and to resolve problems, qualities needed for emotional maturity.
Is Patience Extinct?
Does it seem as if you grew up in a world where patience was expected? Think about growing up when you wanted to watch television you needed to wait till a certain time for the shows to start at 4pm on NTA. If you wanted to buy something you needed to wait to go to the store. Now television is 24 hours a day and you can buy most things online and delivered to your door within a day or two.
We live in a world where the word patience is gradually slipping out of the minds of our younger generation. Most children left to it will grow up believing they have to have everything at their beck and call and now.
Parents sometimes in their bid to provide for their children and give them what they want, say yes to most things. As you focus on teaching your children patience, delayed gratification ask yourself these questions.
- Would it be beneficial to the child in the long run?
- What are the effects on the child – Are they negative or positive?
- What kind of adult do I want to raise?
When we consider all of this, it would give us a view on the way we choose to handle certain parenting issues.
Avoid The Entitlement Mentality
Parents encourage an entitlement mentality by giving into almost every ( if not every) demand the child makes. Children who believe that they are entitled to the best of everything, whether they work for it or not grow up with a sense of entitlement. Children should learn to wait, learn appreciation and that luxury is not a right but a privilege. Parents can teach patience by practicing purposeful delay and make your child wait for things, even if you have the capacity to give the child whatever they want. Your child wants to buy two different games in the supermarket? Ask them to choose one.
Attitude To Delay
Life sometimes brings delay that is not planned for, the attitude to delay can make all the difference. In Nigeria many children are faced with an undesirable ‘waiting period’. Students might need to wait longer to gain admission to the University or face delay due to instability in the education system. The Jamb issue in Nigeria is a discussion constantly on the lips of the average Nigerian youth.
Attitude to delay can make the difference between frustration and staying focised. There are many things students can do during these times such as enroll for certifications, volunteer, get part time work, access free online courses…the list is endless. Adults who learn patience are able to deal with delay and waiting, and know that delay isn’t denial. Refer to How to Navigate through life and circumstances