Yes my husband is having an affair! I just know it. He spends all his time with “it” rather than me – I refuse to call “it” by a name! He would rather spend hours on end holding it, playing with it, spending time with it, making sure he keeps “its” battery fully charged to keep it happy.
When I complain that he is spending all his time with it all he does is to pretend he hears and he assures me that is not the case and promises to spend time with me. It is almost like I cannot compete with it. Am I not as exciting as it, no scratch that I should be more exciting than it! It cannot possibly bring him more joy than me. I mean he is so consumed by it! We go to a movie, he has to get in touch with it. Even when we are on a date he has to get in touch with it. Even at home he would rather spend time with it than me. If I really really nag he will put it down for a little bit, try hard to pay attention to me but eventually go back to “it”.
It has so many tricks and different things it does to keep him attached and attracted. What can I do to win him back? Is it possible? It must be possible.
It is even more annoying because I know “its” name and I know what tricks it uses to keep him captivated. Sadly I even understand why it appears to be more interesting to him than I appear to be but I cannot give up now. The amount of time he spends with it is really affecting the quality of time we spend together. Even while he is driving if it should call him while he is at the wheel he will instinctively respond to it never minding the danger of talking on the phone and driving.
Maybe it is high time I reveal who “it” is and embarrass it to the whole world! Perhaps if I expose it to the world, both it and him will think twice about this their relationship that is cutting me out! It was not even in existence when we got married but here we are now and he spends more time with it than me! Yes I will expose its identity, I will report it to the people who I know can try to tear him away from it and help him see that I am more important.
Yes this message is for you! please leave my husband to spend time with me.
Do you hear me you this B-L-A-C-K-B-E-R-R-Y!!! Yes I don’t care if you are able to supply him with limitless jokes, pings that are never an emergency, access to the World Wide Web, Emails on the go, News, YouTube etc. etc.!!! Leave him alone for me! 🙂
