How Not to Speak to Children

Mum to daughter: “What is it? What do you want Maggy? Gosh you are so annoying”

This is the conversation I heard a mother have with her child at school pickup, this girl could not have been more than 6 years old. She just shrunk and stood quietly beside her mum after this outburst.

There are certain things that parents should just not say to a child like telling your child that he or she is annoying! If the child is indeed out of order and needs to be corrected, there are many ways to ask a child to stop a particular action. Simply tell the child to stop it or even tell them there will be a punishment. Sometimes children suffer because of a parent who does not quite know how to manage his or her emotions of communication style.

On the flip side I saw a mum pick up her child from class and tell him that she missed him soo much and asked excitably about his day school! His whole face lit up.

As parents we need to guard our words, our actions, our utterances and reactions to our children. Don’t forget that they soon grow up and you get what you gave. Literally children are the end products of how they were raised and if you were abusive, judgmental and impatient with your child then you will most likely get a child who will also be impatient and judgmental with you when they do become adults. These children might end up with self-esteem issues, be jittery and might have built up walls around their hearts overtime to protect themselves from their parents harsh words and reactions.

The parenting job description comes with the request to build up your children, we are meant to discipline them as well but not to tear down with abusive words. No child ever reacted negatively to healthy love.

photo source: blackloveandmarriage.com

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